C08P29 – Strange Agents – MOKO Press presents: LeyLines, a Fantasy Adventure Comic by Robin Childs Skip to content
Follow

C08P29 – Strange Agents

C08P29 – Strange Agents published on 13 Comments on C08P29 – Strange Agents

Okay, sounds like most readers would be happy with a fan-art & fan-fiction week. So if you’d like to participate in that, please send your guest art/comics/prose to robinrone _AT_ gmail.com. If you have anything you’d like to be linked, please let me know so I can make sure to direct fellow LeyLians to your other awesome work! Everything will need to be sent in by chapter end, which will be around July 10th.

I’ve been working on scripting chapter nine. I had a very clear idea for it. It was going to be Pakku-centric, and cover more of his back-story. When working on it, I kept finding myself looking for excuses not to start it. I made an outline. Then another, more detailed outline. The detailed outline turned into focusing on some world-building elements for Kuzopa’s economy, specifically its black market. And that in turn yielded a new character, who I’m pretty sure is here to stay. Because Blood Moths are scary and awesome and I love women that are both of those things. So a lot of good came out of this process, but after weeks of trying to start writing, I realized something was wrong. I figured out that the reason I wasn’t starting was because I was dreading the chapter. I was afraid of it.

I spoke with Cory about it, and his take was this: “Maybe you’re not ready to write it yet.” Pakku’s back-story has a lot of elements that are closely tied to my own, recent past. In many cases, pulled directly from it. As they say: Write what you know. The problem is, sometimes that means you’re trying to pull from emotions that are still raw. Sometimes, we’re not ready to write what we know. My therapist has a phrase that I’ve always felt was very important for me to remember: “Sometimes, resistance exists for a reason.” Acknowledging that resistance, and respecting it, created a huge sense of relief.

I’m not sure when we’ll get to Pakku’s chapter. I know it’s coming, but I don’t know when I’ll be ready for it, and I guess that’s okay. Better to write it when I have more perspective on it. When I understand my experience, and therefore his experience, more completely. The thing I am most pleased with is that I recognized the signals my unconscious mind was sending. Enough to at least talk about it with Cory. In the past I would have just kept pushing until either the story broke, or I did. I would not have been able to respect that resistance. Now I’m happily working on a chapter nine that I’m ready for, and have had in my mind since the first few outlines for the whole LeyLines story. It’s satisfying to know that I’m learning more about my own signals and limitations. It’s nice to work WITH myself, instead of AGAINST myself.

What unconscious signals do you have? How does your brain or body tell you something that your conscious mind might have missed?

13 Comments

Children visit this site. Moderate your language accordingly.

Me and my brain have a good relationship. I try not to piss it off and it tries to not be too cryptic with me, dreams excepted.

I’m glad you were able to come to these conclusions. Means you know yourself very well(maybe better than you believe)

Creating is such a funny business. One minute the idea is not there, and the next minute it is.

I am not inclined to put names on things I don’t understand, and I sure don’t feel like taking credit for ideas that just seem to appear. I get tired very quickly of each era’s complex system of terms and theories explaining how the “psyche” (which may or may not have “layers”) assembles experience into discoveries. That’s a fine pastime for people who like it–I don’t. I just like to make things, and I like the feeling of thinking about what to make, and I don’t like to push it when I’m spent. Not gonna happen. I just have to let it alone.

Creativity is a precious ability, and it should be guarded with great fierceness. Your artwork is stunning and your storytelling is full of great wisdom. Let it unfold.

I’ll betcha you’re more tired than you guess, and when you reach the next level of rest your source of ideas will surprise you with some directions that will make your eyes pop.

I enjoy terminology for the difficult-to-explain in that it helps create a basis for discussion. By having a common vocabulary, I can quickly convey the general issue that I’m dealing with, even if it’s not exact to the problem at hand. (“I’m having a very complex-activated day” for example.)

You might be right about the weariness. I have a lot of trouble telling. It’s not my creativity that’s flagging. Just my ability to produce. Hopefully the break will give me a little time to catch up.

I always get a nagging feeling at the back of my head when I feel I’m missing something. It often gets to the point where I am (not always) silently screaming ‘WHAT IS IT? WHAT AM I LOOKING FOR?” while staring around wildly.
I also feel like I’m constantly being watched, but that’s probably just common paranoia. Probably. I suppose it could be my art muse giving me the finger while shooting daggers from their eyes as I ignore deadlines.

Hahaha! I get that feeling all the time! Along with the always classic “Why did I come in here?” Sometimes I think I’d lose my head if it wasn’t attached. Actually, half the time I AM losing my head, in a manner of speaking, so I guess having it attached has not been that helpful after all. 😉

I hate it when I walk out of a room intending to do something, forgot what it was and then try to spend the last five minutes retracing my steps to figure out what it was. I don’t think in a way that’s easy to trace (My trains of thought go from LA to Seattle and then skip over to Tokyo) so I’m often forced to wait three hours for it to come back to me. Equally frustrating is when I’m talking, get interrupted, and then forget what I was going to say.
I feel your pain on the signal thing! I used to have a number problem (mild OCD) and got over it, but then the problem reappeared as a color obsession.
…that’s not quite the same thing. Is it? Oh well. Anyway, those hydras are a part of you, like it or not–even though it’s a pain in the butt to try to get around them, they define you in whatever small way they can. That being said, may your neural signals/habits give way to something less annoying.

My body is a complete and utter jerk too me far too often. I do try and respect our boundaries, dear body, but some of the stuff you pull on me is ridiculous and unjustified. I am, for instance, still angry about the knee. Dancing? That’s how you hurt it, dancing? And while I have learned numerous lessons in the prolonged aftermath – like, don’t limp or you’ll hurt the other leg too – I really feel we all could have been better off if the knee had just been built with better materials in the first place.

Don’t get me started on the brain. Brain, you’re the most insidious little backstabbing worm of the entire lot. I could swear you stir up trouble with the others. Throat muscles decide they’re going to clench painfully tight? I blame you, brain. They wouldn’t have thought this up on their own. Anxiety acting up? It’s like you’re not even trying to hide your wrongdoing anymore, brain. For shame. I thought you were better than this, but no, apparently your favorite pastime is thinking up new ways to screw with me.

Sounds like you and your brain need to sit down sometime and have a heart to heart…er…neuron-to-neuron.

It does sometimes feel that every time I figure out a new signal, a new path, a new way to overcome a bad pattern, the brain just comes up with a new way to resurrect that bad pattern in a new form. At least it keeps things interesting, but sometimes I just wish I could figure out how to kill these dang hydras.

Ah, the nervous system–so complex and yet so rudimentary when you need more fine tuning! OK so I’ll be resigned to hurting. But why give me the SAME symptoms for everything (just read the warning labels on the med bottle to see what I mean!) when I’d like just enough variation to enable a bit of diagnosis, perhaps? Aargh It’s not just the brain–I’m sure the whole system is in cahoots.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *